The best excuse ever: Diarrhea.
Seriously, call in sick for work or explain to your professor why you need to retake that midterm. Fuck dead family members, diarrhea is the best excuse ever. What is your boss/professor going to do? Here is a sample dialogue:
You: Sorry I couldn't come in, I had diarrhea.
Boss/Teacher: ...
You: It was really bad. Explosive to say the least.
Boss/Teacher: Uhm... well, you should take care of that.
You: Oh god, here it goes again. (run or put phone down)
Boss/Teacher: (disgusted look on his/her face)
Bonus points if your boss is of the opposite sex. Triple points if you return to work/school pale and smelling of week old cabbage. Hell, smear a chocolate bar on your pants, not that there is any extra work involved in this excuse.
No comments:
Post a Comment